There are not two Shambhalas. Or a good Shambhala and an anti-Shambhala. All feelings of belonging belong. That is Shambhala.
Everyone is in a different place, and yet we all hold something of Shambhala within us. And there is a sense of staying together.
I connected to Chogyam Trungpa’s teaching. I’m not sure I want to be part of Shambhala in the future or continue my path because it involves learning from the Sakyong, which is not something I am willing to support. I feel very confused about my belonging to Shambhala and will stay curious.
I seem to swing between ignoring the difficulty to despair about it. I obviously need to keep working on this to find other places to see it from.
Why is “Shambhala” so White?
There is a lot more pain and confusion about the way forward than I was paying attention to. I think I was hoping it had been long enough that it had faded but I am not very comfortable with pain and always hope to smooth things over.
I welcomed the collapse of the hierarchy and hoped it might lead to change. I can’t really say more than that. I still feel like nothing has really changed that matters to me, so I have shifted my sense of belonging in Shambhala to that of a happy outsider.
Shambhala is bigger than “Shambhala, Inc.” Maybe this disarray is good because it will release us from the narrowness of the organisation as it has manifested in the latest version.
The organization has spent years, long before the crisis, becoming a narrow, self-protective, exclusive, self-serving thing, looking for ways to get people to belong. For another analogy, it could be a glorious umbrella, open in all directions, a warm, fertile field for all the seeds Shambhala has planted over the years to grow in, including itself.
The organisation is the politics. These conversations are the culture, where the culture changes the politics.
A longing to have an open heart, and to see the experience of deep sadness and joy that each person has. This can help with our editing of our opinions.
If there is an “it,” we are it.
Much appreciation to hear others expressions of their belonging or not. I appreciated sharing of the unknown of how this will pay out. I felt people’s genuineness, and heard their frustrations.
So much gratitude for all of you. We are all feeling heartbreak, no matter where we are at. Wanting to see us all sit under the umbrella together, respecting one another, and no one feeling left out.
Hearing each other is a powerful experience.